One Moment
Delores sat there on the bed with her empty paper plate and watched Terry finish his last slice. She hadn’t been able to stop watching him for long. He swore ON me, she thought. Not just to me. It had to be something he valued more than anything, and he chose me. She was well past smitten. She was in “composing romantic fiction about them” territory here. She was afraid that she desperately needed him. And his stupid vows just sat there in the way. This was killing her. She’d read about this kind of thing in books and thought it was tripe. She owed some people a very big apology in a couple of Discord servers.
“Are all slumber parties this emotionally devastating?” he asked.
She thought about that for a minute.
“In my experience, more often than not. Someone always ended up crying at the ones I went to.”
He nodded.
“And this is a thing they have kids do?”
She laughed. God, she needed that laugh. He grinned at her.
“Yes, Terry. We specifically make children do this so it keeps the mental health field going.”
“Great.” He said, still smiling at her. “Let’s never do this again.” She laughed again.
They fell into an awkward silence. She decided she wasn’t going to let the night end on a terrible mood on her part. He’d opened up to her about so many things tonight. She felt they both deserved a reward. Besides, he was all the way over there right now.
“Let’s watch a movie.” She said.
Terry sat up.
“What kind of movie?” he asked.
“It’s October, you goof. A spoopy movie.”
He blinked once. The Terry sign for “processing”.
“Spoopy? Is that like spooky?”
“Yes. Now let me look at the channel guide.” She said
She crawled back up to the head of the bed and sat down and started scrolling. Terry sat next to the TV and every time she looked at him, he was watching her. It was obvious to her he was holding himself back. God, he was distracting. Especially now. She tilted her head to the side and a thought struck her.
“Hey. Give me a pose with the fingernails. I want to see how they look.” She said and grinned at him.
“How do you pose fingernails?” he asked.
She threw her right arm across her chest at an angle and spread her fingers to show off her nails. She turned her head away from her hand. She tilted her chin down and tried to do her best haughty model face. Terry just looked at her with an expression that screamed “really?”.
“Fine.” He said and did the same pose she had.
She stared. His hair had grown longer in the front over the months and his bangs fell to block an eye. That one visible eye smoldered. His expression serious. Where in the HELL had this come from? Her sweet, goofy, golden retriever and now THIS?! She realized she was staring at him like a piece of meat and she was in serious danger of panting.
“I need you,” she said very slowly and carefully, “to never do that in front of me again.”
He dropped the pose, thank God, and looked at her.
“That awful?”
“Terry, you are very lucky I have so much self control.”
He looked incredulous.
“If this is self control I’d hate to see you let loose.”
“No you wouldn’t.” Her eyes widened. “I AM SO SORRY. I didn’t mean to say that out loud. I mean I didn’t mean to say that. I am going to find a movie we can watch and then die of shame.”
She started furiously scrolling the menu again. He looked like an animal set loose from a trap after that. Sort of. He also looked curious. She had to force herself to not think about it. Something caught her attention.
She smiled.
“Terry! Have you ever seen Gremlins?”
He looked disgusted and her heart sank.
“Yeah. We had an infestation of the things out in Edwards back in, I think it was 2017? Only took five of them to take a whole tractor apart in six minutes and start chucking the-“
“THE MOVIE, TERRANCE.”
“Then, no.” He said. “I have never seen Gremlins.”
“Great! Come sit down and we’ll watch.” She said, patting the bed next to her.
She smiled to see he didn’t hesitate after her blatant staring. Maybe SHE was the one being awkward. He sat down next to her and when she looked at him, he gave her one of those beautiful smiles that made her feel special. She hoped she could pay attention to the movie.
Several hours later, Gremlins 2 finished. They’d lucked out on a double feature. By the end they were both under the covers. Delores had put her head on Terry’s shoulder at some point. She’d expected him to move, but instead he’d put an arm around her. She felt so comfortable there she was afraid she’d fall asleep. After the movie, she turned the TV off.
“That was fun. Inaccurate, but fun.” Terry said.
“Oh.” She said, suddenly remembering the text she’d gotten when the old woman got chucked out the window. “Elton texted. Check out is at noon. He wants to meet us for breakfast between eight and nine. Also, he’s alive.”
Terry stiffened.
“Crap,” he said, “I meant to go check on him.”
“He also said,” she continued, “Tell Terry not to worry about me. I’m not nearly as bad off as I looked.”
He looked at her.
“He did this on purpose.”
“I believe he did.” She said, nodding.
Terry reached over and turned the light off, shaking his head. The room was suddenly dark, with the night lights of the city coming through the sheer curtains providing the only light. She closed her eyes for a moment and just enjoyed being there.
“Good night, Delores.” He said quietly.
Before he could roll over or anything, a thought struck her. It was one she’d had in the back of her mind since the previous night. It was a terrible idea. She could ruin everything. Doing it terrified her. What if he left? She was going to do it anyway because, at this point, she had no choice.
“I should probably let you get some sleep. . .” She said. Terry noticed the unfinished sentence.
“But?” he said.
She couldn’t help but smile. She raised her self off of him and leaned on an elbow, facing him.
“I’ll let you get some sleep, but. . . I want you to give me a good night kiss.” There. It was out. She’d said it. She couldn’t unsay it. She’d kissed him, sure, but this? This was different. She NEEDED to know if he would. She needed HIM to do it. Just once. She could see the light reflecting in his suddenly wide eyes. The butterflies in her stomach were enormous and violent. She hadn’t been this frightened in months.
“You can’t be serious.” He said, his voice entirely too jovially to be that jovial.
“It might be the one chance you get, Terry.” She said.
They sat there, gazes locked. If it was a battle of wills, it was his will against his own will. She continued to smile as her insides screamed. She was afraid she was going to start shaking if this went on much longer. She might anyway.
He squeezed his eyes closed and when he finally opened them again he stared at the ceiling, a look of resignation on his face.
“FINE! FINE. Fine. One. You get ONE, you hear me, Delores? ONE. And I’ve never actually done this myself so it’s going to be terrible and I-“
“Terry?” She said quietly.
He stopped dead at the mention of his name. She leaned back against the headboard. She tilted her head so she could look at him through her eyelashes in that way that made him blush so badly. When she spoke again, it was softly. The silence after was deafening.
“Just kiss me. Please?”
Her heart was pounding. She kept her hands still, hoping he wouldn’t notice that she had, in fact, started shaking. She felt nine kinds of fool for this. If she knew him, he was going to give her a peck on the cheek or maybe a peck on the forehead, and he’d go to sleep. That would be like him. But instead, he leaned over her slowly, hands on either side of her, on the bed. He moved closer to her. He stopped so close, his face filled her vision. That beautiful face. Her breathing was shallow. He just hovered there, wide-eyed.
“What?” she whispered. God, was her voice that shaky?
“I just want to remember this if it IS the only time. I don’t ever want to forget.”
She thought that she could have melted right there. And then, Terry closed the gap, and he kissed her.
Delores had been kissed plenty of times. She wasn’t new to this. Any of this. Kissing was just a thing you did. No big deal. Until she’d met Terry, and she’d had to resort to stealing them at any opportunity lately.
This one was different, because of course Terry WOULD be different. It felt like everything Terry hadn’t been able to say or do for four months was in this kiss. It was his care, his devotion, his needs, distilled into a single moment, and when his lips touched hers, he shared that moment with her in a flood. She heard herself whimper.
She’d expected just a moment. Something brief. It continued far longer than she ever would have expected from him. She slid her arms around him, pulling him close. She found herself sliding down to lay on the bed and she pulled him down. She felt him ease his weight onto her. His hand touched her side. She ran her fingers along his back and completely lost herself for what felt like ages.
Then, he finally pulled away. By the time he did, she was gasping.
Terry looked down at Delores in shock.
“That. . . That’s not what I meant to happen.” He said quietly. He was trying to catch his breath. He could feel her breathing beneath him. Her body moving. He had to hold himself back.
“Terry, I have an idea.” She finally said, between breaths.
“Yeah?” He was desperate to hear it.
“What if,” she paused to catch her breath, “what if we considered tonight a preview?”
“A preview?” he asked. He prayed she had a good argument.
“A truce? Something. Anything.” She said. “I could show you what you could have. With me.” It came out in a whisper. “If things were different.”
He felt the heat of her breath against his face. He kept having to pull his mouth back. He felt a fingernail run down his neck and he nearly lost it.
“Terry, I’ve been taken with you since the first week, and you care about me, obviously. But this is killing me.”
He felt her fingers running through his hair now. Her other hand was on his back and he hadn’t noticed it go under his shirt. Those fingers trailed along his spine. He shivered.
“I don’t know what you need to do inside that head of yours to justify this thing between us, but I wish you would do it, because I don’t know how much more of this I can take.”
Her expression broke his heart. Defeat. She’d already accepted that she wasn’t going to win this fight, but was going to go down swinging.
“Either that, or. . .or. . .” She couldn’t finish it.
Terry looked down at her, and a complex series of thoughts ran through his mind. Elton’s urging for this. The hypocrisy of the knights. The Order and its requirements of him. Didn’t Terry deserve something though? Couldn’t he just be happy? Just once? Was that right? Would the world end if he wasn’t alone?
Terry turned to the part of him that told him the right thing to do. It was the one thing that he had been able to count on his whole life, and right then it was screaming at him in desperation. Don’t let her go! It screamed. Don’t be alone again! PLEASE! That hit him like a punch to the head. He knew what to do now. He had said it to himself the previous night. She’d be the one thing that could do it. And it didn’t have to be all of them. . .
Terry reached around and took Delores’s hand from the back of his head and carefully brought it between them. He, once again, placed her hand on his chest and held it in place.
“Terry, please. Not another vow. I just can’t-“ she began, but he interrupted.
“I, Terrance Lingal,” he began very quietly, “having found them to be unjust and cruel, hereby renounce any and all vows I have made about relationships with mages, or with anyone else.”
He then lifted her hand, kissed it, and held it in his, waiting.
The look of wonder on her face was worth every single word he’d said a thousand times over. She pulled her hand free and touched his face. Her hand was visibly shaking. When it touched his cheek, he put his hand on it to keep it steady.
“Terry,” she said in an trembling voice, “are you sure? I mean, are you really sure? This is-“
Terry leaned in and kissed her again. Delores kissed him back like she was trying to get everything she could from him before he changed his mind or vanished. He pulled away and looked into her eyes.
“Delores, please believe me. I am not going anywhere, and I am not going to change my mind in the morning. I swear to you. I will be here with you.”
Relief flooded her face, and that was the last thing either of them said of note for a very long time.
Delores laid on her side in the pre-dawn light watching Terry sleep. She should have been asleep as well, but it had finally happened. How was she supposed to sleep after that? When he had forsaken those vows, she had been terrified that he’d change or be gone. But he was still here, and it was still Terry. And it had finally happened.
He had changed though. Terry had become everything she’d dreamed he’d be, including a romantic. He’d told her things that had brought tears to her eyes while they’d rested. He’d made her the center of his world.
But now it was morning, and Delores had started awake after only a few hours. She’d had a horrible thought. Terry could regret all of this. His entire life was built on his vows. That regret could turn to resentment. He could come to hate her. She’d decided that she would give him the chance to back out of this and retake those oaths. She had to.
While she watched, he stirred. His eyes opened, and when he saw her there, the sappiest Charlie Brown smile spread across his face. She had to smile back.
“Hey.” He said.
“Hey, yourself.” She said back. She suddenly became nervous again. She didn’t really want to do this. It must have shown on her face.
“What’s wrong?”
“Terry,” she said, “Last night was wonderful. I mean that. But I have to give you the chance to. . .”
Delores realized she had already started giggling as he pulled her close and started slowly kissing her face and neck. Each kiss was punctuated with a quiet “no” from him. She had to pull back from it, because there was no way she could concentrate with him doing that.
“Terry, please.” She said, trying to be serious. “What if you regre-mmmph.”
The kiss he gave her stopped all thought for a time. She did hope he didn’t do that thing with his tongue again or. . . He did the thing. She just melted. When he finally stopped, she sighed. She just looked at him and shook her head.
“Are you sure you aren’t going to regret this?” She finally asked. She’d abandoned trying to offer him a way out.
“My only regret is that I’m not a poet. I am not going to get this right. I don’t have the words.” He said. “I sacrificed my childhood, my whole life, for the Order, Delores. All it’s given me in return is loneliness and disappointment. Well, I want something for me. Just this once.”
She almost didn’t believe he was saying this.
“With the way the Order is run, I don’t care if they send every knight and cleric after me over this. Let them come. I’d fight them for you, Delores Cody, because you are worth it. You are worth more than I will ever be able to give for you. You are my happiness.”
Delores knew she was about to cry and she didn’t care. He leaned his forehead into hers. He spoke in a whisper.
“I would do anything for you.”
She stared into those big, dark eyes and bit her lip.
“We have two more hours. Show me.”
Elton Beasley, Troubadour and punching bag to the king of headaches, sat at a table in the breakfast. . .eaty. . .thing (DAMN the English language!) of the hotel with a bowl of cornflakes and a glass of OJ. He was wearing his sunglasses because daylight was a tool of the devil. Besides. He hadn’t slept enough.
Three hours, he thought. How in the name of GOD can anyone go for three hours? He just sat there watching the entrance and then, in they walked. Terry and Delores both looked far too chipper and awake. They started to walk toward the breakfast bar, but Terry stopped Delores and whispered something in her ear. She gave him a huge grin, and kissed him.
Elton sat up straighter. In public, he thought. Terry smiled down at her and then Delores walked to his table. She looked like she was floating. Well, not literally, but metaphorically. She was a mage, after all. Distinctions had to be made. She pulled up a chair and sat across from him and then her smile dropped.
“Elton,” she said, “you look terrible.”
“And you,” he replied, “may be the most active two people I have ever had the misfortune of sharing a headboard wall with.”
She went pale and he grinned in satisfaction. Then he frowned.
“That was mean. I’m sorry. I am so hung over I started googling if we can grow me a new liver with magic. I’m not mad or anything. You will never find a bigger Terry and Delores shipper than me.”
She looked surprised.
“Wait, that’s a thing?” she said.
“You don’t read the hashtags, do you?”
She leaned toward him over the table.
“There is a hashtag?!” she whispered loudly. “You can NOT tell Terry about this.”
Elton laughed.
“Like he knows what a hashtag is.”
They sat there as Terry struggled to get through the breakfast line. There was a large family in front of him attempting to get all the pancakes and he wasn’t having it.
“You put us in the room together.” Delores said. Not a question. He nodded.
“Thank you.” She said. She wore a small smile and seemed to be thinking back to things. Elton held his tongue as long as he could.
“How was it?” he asked.
Delores looked up in shock and then around to see if anyone was close enough to hear.
“Elton! Jesus, we’re at the breakfast table! There are children like, right there!” she said in a harsh whisper.
“What?!” he replied in the same tone. “I’m not asking for the gory details. I’m just asking for a sort of summary. A couple of “mood words” for the Chronicles at some point. You know, after you two conquer the stigma of a knight and a mage being together.”
Delores glanced around her so much she looked like a terrible spy. She looked at Terry, still wrestling for flap-jacks. She leaned across the table toward Elton, conspiratorially. She spoke in a whisper.
“He plowed me like a field and I have never been so satisfied in my LIFE.”
Elton nearly sprayed his OJ but managed to do so back into the glass.
“Well that’s more than I was expecting.” He said, honestly thrown off balance by the statement. “I was expecting words like “sweet” and “nice” and “awkward”.
She shook her head and scooted her chair closer. Apparently Elton had suddenly graduated to the role of girlfriend.
“You know how he seems like he’s good at everything he does?”
Elton nodded.
“If that was his first time,” she said, “I can’t WAIT for him to get more experience.”
“Great.” Elton said, Suddenly paying attention to his neglected cereal. “That’ll do. Thank you.” She continued unabated.
“I mean he knew exactly where to-“
“JESUS, Delores!” he nearly shouted, dropping back to a whisper. “We’re at a breakfast table! There are kids like, RIGHT THERE!” He looked around. “Text it to me later or something.”
Delores gave him a devilish grin. She started watching Terry maneuver through the large family and her expression softened. The smile lost all of it’s bite as she spoke.
“I’ve never seen a person be so sweet. It was like something inside him opened last night.”
Terry was finally making progress. Delores continued in a near whisper.
“He hasn’t said the words. I don’t know if he ever will, but I don’t think I’ve ever felt so. . .loved.”
There it was. That was going in the Chronicles. He’d have to make a note on his phone. A thought struck him.
“Crap. I gotta give him his phone.”
He went digging in his pocket and put a brand new cellphone on the table, which Delores immediately snatched up. She took a photo of herself, and went about setting it to Terry’s wallpaper. She then added his number to her phone.
All Elton could do was shake his head and smile. They’d gone from adorable people with issues to that adorable couple that makes you want to throw up in one night. He couldn’t be happier about it.
Terry finally made it back with food. As he approached, Delores’s smile grew until she grinned like an idiot. When Elton looked at Terry, the Errant was looking at Delores like he’d been gone a month. Elton watched as he set Delores’s food in front of her, kissed her on the head, and then sat down next to her and immediately dug in. Elton shook his head.
“Well, at least you’re not trying to act like it didn’t happen.” He said.
Watching Terry freeze and his eyes go wide was great. Terry hadn’t even thought about what he was doing. Delores tried to give Elton a stern look but she was also trying not to giggle at Terry’s face. Terry set his fork down, sat straight, and looked straight at Elton.
“Let’s not pretend you didn’t orchestrate this.” The Errant said.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Elton said, smiling. “Honestly, I’m just glad this is all out in the open between us.” He lowered his voice. “And as long as you don’t tell the Order, they won’t know you broke a vow.”
Terry had picked his fork up again, but stopped and looked Elton in the eyes. He replied just as quietly.
“I renounced that vow, Elton.”
Elton felt like he’d been punched in the head. Did he just say that, he thought.
“Terry, the Peace and Truce of God isn’t à la carte. You can’t just pick and choose what you want to do. It’s supposed to be all or nothing.”
Delores looked ashamed at her role in this. Terry set his fork down again and when he leaned across the table, his face was calm but the rage in his eyes made Elton lean back. Other than Hilochita, he had never seen Terry openly angry.
“I have walked this city and watched knights who swore these same oaths and dedicated themselves to these same ideals behave like animals. I was attacked by four of them because I tried to be something better. Because I dared to live up to my ideals. They have caused the public to not just fear, but hate us. And they do all of this within sight of our leadership. And our leadership does nothing, Elton. NOTHING!”
The room became quiet as he shouted the word and Elton made soothing gestures. Delores placed her hands on his forearm and whispered something to try and calm him. He looked around himself then.
“Sorry everyone.” He said loudly. He turned to Elton again and continued in a quieter tone but lost none of the intensity.
“I refuse to sink to their level, Elton. I will not break my vows, but I WILL start renouncing those vows if I find them unjust or wrong. I have precious little respect left for the Order today. I’m trying here, man. I am trying so hard to be a better knight. But they don’t want that, they don’t CARE about that, and I refuse to continue to torture myself for a group that doesn’t care if I stick to the rules or not.”
By the time he finished he looked like tears of frustration might start falling. Elton nodded.
“It’s ok man. Thank you for explaining it to me. I didn’t mean to make you mad.” He knew he wasn’t going to get the full story of what happened at his meeting till that night so he filed his questions away for later. Terry nodded and seemed to calm.
“I’m sorry too, Elton. You didn’t deserve that. I’m not supposed to get angry like that.” he said.
Elton thought that sounded like bullshit. Delores gave Terry a look.
Elton pushed Terry’s phone over to him.
“Here.” He said. Terry looked at the phone like a caveman being shown a mirror. Curiosity and wariness on his face. He picked it up. As soon as he saw the wallpaper he smiled. He looked at Delores but she was typing on her own phone with a grin on her face.
“I’m sending you your first text.” She said.
The phone dinged and Terry managed to get the message pulled up. He looked at her with his brows lowered and Delores laughed.
“What?” Elton asked. Terry turned the screen to him.
“WAT R U WEARING” he read.
Delores cackled. Elton just smiled. Delores was already typing something else and the phone dinged again. Terry read it. His eyes widened, and he blushed. He put the phone in is pocket.
“What now?” Elton said, really curious this time.
“Nothing.” Terry said. “Nothing suitable for the public.”
Elton smirked at Delores. She was grinning like a maniac. Elton had one question he needed answered.
“Where are we going now, boss?”
Terry thought for a long time as he ate. Elton saw something stewing inside him. Terry would look at Delores, and then he would look at Elton.
“This is going to sound silly.”
“Terry,” Delores interrupted, “the only silly thing you’ve ever said was that time you asked how Hot Pockets worked.” The Errant blushed at that.
“Anyway,” Terry began again, “this might sound weird or silly and I don’t care.” He looked at them both in turn again.
“After yesterday? Just for a bit, I’d like to go home.”